It was my mom’s dream to have a lot of children, but she had to stop at four. I for one am grateful because as the first born, parentified daughter, I can’t imagine how depressing my childhood would have been with more babies to take care of.
For years my mother has relived her fantasy by watching the Duggars on TV. She’d often ask if I watched the show.
“Nope. I have zero interest in watching an authoritarian father and a perfect mother with a sweet, but controlling voice, oppress their offspring.”
Did I say that out loud? Nope again, because we were that family just with fewer kids and I have learned that to express my feelings will only bring an argument and threats that Jesus is coming to give me my just reward. So when my mom asks what I think of Michelle Duggar, I usually just throw up a little in my mouth and change the subject.
For full disclosure, my parents have never followed Bill Gothard or been a part of his church. They didn’t have to because apparently the warped principles he taught got around and are displayed in many cults.
The first step in family oppression is to follow the train up a child rules endorsed by the Pearls who wrote a book teaching parents to ignore or beat their crying babies. The plan is to break a child’s will. My parents also didn’t know or read the Pearls’ book, but I received my first spanking when I was only one week old. Such techniques were passed down for generations until Bill Gothard and his church turned them into a movement.
I could never trust that the Duggar children were safe. I’ve always said if you see perfect children there’s a weapon hidden behind their calm exterior. Much like the angelic faced Duggars, people used to say that we were the most well-behaved kids at church. That’s because we were haunted by my father’s belt. I’m not sure what weapon the Duggars used on their children, but that many kids staying calm and quiet like statues is not normal. And remember guilt and shame and threats of dying in hell are weapons too just as much as eating a raw onion or being belted.
Shiny Happy People has four episodes. the first one shows how the Duggar family came to fame with a TV Show even after Jim Bob and Michelle knew their eldest son Josh, had molested four of his sisters.
It seems from the beginning, this TV show was propaganda—a way to get America to accept the quiver-full way of life and teachings because the Duggar family was entrenched in Bill Gothard’s church.
To “be quiverful”was to have as many children as possible because of a Bible verse that states a father whose quiver is full of children has joy. The Duggars have denied that they are a quiver-full family, but the evidence is in their 19 children whatever they want to call it.
Jim Bob said they wouldn’t do the show unless they could openly share their faith. This backfired when Josh who got away with molesting his sisters, got caught having an Ashley Madison account where he cheated on his wife. The motto of Ashley Madison is “Life is short, have an affair.”
If that wasn’t humiliating enough for Josh’s wife Anna, her husband was caught and convicted for buying child pornography. When Jim Bob told the court he couldn’t remember that Josh molested his sisters, the judge told him to leave because he had a bad memory
Anna continues to stand by Josh even though he is now in jail. Many wonder why Anna is loyal to Josh, but a closer look at the way women are raised in Bill Gothard’s church explains her mindset.
From an early age children are taught to obey all authorities over them. Bill Gothard created an illustration called “The Umbrella of Authority.” This illustration shows how a man bows to authority from God, then the wife bows to her husband and the children bow to the mother.
Of course it’s all lies. We each have direct access to God. But when you grow up having your will beaten out of you and it’s drilled into to support your man no matter what he does, it makes it hard to psychologically see your own needs as important. Add to that the many kids and no true education—how can she see herself free to leave him or support herself and the kids? Anna is a victim here, and yet she’s probably furthering the lies and abuse to the next generation.
The second episode shows that this abusive empire is so much bigger than the Duggars. Bill Gothard’s church ran a homeschooling (read brainwashing) empire.
The third episode reveals how Gothard and Jim Bob Duggar built their empire on the free labor of young people. Jim Bob did not pay his kids—even the adults for their participation in his family TV shows.
When some of his kids were not planning to go back to the show, he sent them a copy of the contract they’d signed. Instead of the loving father he portrays himself as on TV, Jim Bob has covered up his daughters’ molester, used his kids for free labor, and threatened them if they didn’t show up for a job in which he was pocketing all the money. Worst. Father. Of. The. Year.
The fourth episode explains how Jim Bob and Michelle Duggar have become the face of this movement now that Gothard was fired from his leadership after molesting at least thirty women.
The idea of each child being a quiver has been weaponized in this church by saying that each child will go to war with society.
I decided to watch this documentary because I’ve never been one to hide my head in the sand and I like to know what’s going on. I discovered this movement is much bigger than the Duggars.
Bill Gothard’s church has created an entire generation of Josh Duggars where patriarchy and authoritarianism reign and men and boys not only abuse girls, women and children, but they are training to go out into the political realm to turn the United States into their version of a so-called Christian nation.
Many of these homeschooled people have no knowledge of science or healthy relationships, but they know how to network with those who agree with them to parade in political rallies or work as clerks for governors and Supreme Court Justices.
Whether we like it or not, whether we pay attention, or ignore them, this army of dysfunctional, beaten, homeschooled children are being groomed for politics and they will affect America’s future for years to come.
As for Jim Bob and Michelle Duggar, like all narcissistic parents, they deny events and claim this documentary has been derogatory and has sensationalized their lives.
What’s really derogatory is four of their daughters being molested by their brother and parents who covered it up. Heck, forget what is sensational and derogatory—what’s evil is people like them abusing their children and lying in the name of God.
There are no happy people in this documentary—it should have been titled, “Shiny, crappy people because that actually describes Bill Gothard and Jim Bob and Michelle Duggar.
If you watch this series be prepared that it contains content that could be upsetting for some people. not everyone needs to watch it. But stay alert because not all homeschoolers and not all Christians are the same.
Peace and freedom
Cherilyn
Little Red Survivor Tips is always free. It’s just my thoughts about surviving at the intersection of family, narcissistic and religious abuse, and current events.
I also wrote a book Chasing Eden, about my strange childhood.
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We need a dislike button. And yes the show should definitely be called “ shiny crappy people”. Good rename , Cherilyn. Well stated. Thank you for sharing.
Actually, this was hard to "like." I rejected the toxic patriarchy of Bill Gothard back in the mid-70s, and to see it still flourishing and flaunted and more toxic than ever, and remember people I love having been wounded deeply by his poison,--it makes me feel sick.
Thank you for the report.
I don't feel the need to watch... I hardly know what mixture of compost to call it. For sure, it has poop in it.
But oh!--I ache for the victims!